“Dearly Beloved, we are gathered here today to join in holy matrimony the love of rock and roll. This is the Reverend Red Hot Chili Peppers Presiding. Please rise as the wedding party approaches, grab both of your ass cheeks and shake that shit like you just don’t care no more!”
That’s the way I see it anyways. What we got here is one balls-out jamfest of damn funky, gritty rock and roll that sounds like the result of a shotgun Tennessee nuptial of the quirk funk of Primus with the mid-American-rootsy twang rock of Blind Melon. Throw in a big nod to the ass moving grooves of the presiding Reverend Red Hot Chili Peppers and a wedding party full of the dirty guitar work of Queens of the Stone Age and we got ourselves a wedding for the ages.
The Groom? He’s all rock baby. As on the scorching opening track “Run From Your Master," his guitars flame and fire over that rock steady rhythm section like hornets dive bombing a playground. Screeching with some fuzz and feedback, his riffs are complex, heavy, yet tasteful. His tone is rather light, not brutal, again reminding me of the scratch of Blind Melon. He’s not afraid of time changes, neo-jazzy textures, deep bluesy riffs, or pure unadulterated stoner fuzz. He brings a quality of serious musicianship to the proceedings. I like him. He’s a good man.
The Bride? She’s got booty for days! One of those big, nice and round booties that just wants to shake and groove all night long. She's sexy and hot and brimming with lust. She loves her bass tight and funky. She likes her beat locked firmly in the ass-shaking vein. No one stands like a wallflower at her wedding. Just dig that Primus bass freakout of “Dyin’ Blues”. And then when the stuttering guitar of her man joins her on the dancefloor, Reverend Chili Pepper just can’t be content at the podium. He’s got to jump down to the dancefloor and work his white collar into a hot and sticky mess. This is southern groove funk/rock and it’s guaranteed to keep the hotties moving on the dancefloor. Love to see this live. She’s a true beauty.
The wedding party brings lots more to the party. The best man sings like a combination of Shannon Hoon and Anthony Kiedis (except he actually knows how to carry a tune.) He’s a countryboy through and through with a gentle twang to his voice, but not afraid to rough it up at times. At others he’ll spit it out like a Keidis stuttered rap. (don’t worry, he never ruins things by actually rapping.)
The best man’s toast is given to “Religious Fervor”, just a terror of blistering, blues-fuzzed guitars with a backbone of pure funky delights. Think Screaming Cheetah Wheelies here (who were a helluva lot better band than they ever got credit for). Ballsy, kinda retro, dirty and rough. Blues with attitude and a dose of pure rock.
Every wedding needs a first dance, and “Eye for an Eye” slows things down enough for the bride and groom to lock bodies and sway in lustful delight. Beautiful guitars brought by the groom marry seamlessly to the bride’s love of the funky in this slow-boiling number. Off-kilter harmony vocals really bring this song to the highlight reel, as the two voices lock together in just off-time unison
Then the party’s got to get started and the 1-10’s blow the doors off with the mean-spirited blues-infected, heavy jam of “Crazy for You”. Again, we got it all here, the whole wedding party losing themselves in a hedonistic delight of Blind Melon guitars, big funky bass runs. This song builds and dips like some sexual event, perhaps bringing on the passion of the wedding night to follow. A little Zeppelin influence here? Sure, they shoulda been invited to the party. They’re in the corner hanging with the Screaming Cheetahs. Just digging this one.
Mr. Primus leads the party through another mid-american rock/funk workout with that amazing basswork of “Dragon Fly.” Another mid-tempo burner with some lava-lamp guitar, this one ups the sexuality big time. The bride is getting hot. The groom is horny. Together they weave their bodies through the undulating groove, back and forth. This song is so hot, the entire wedding party can smell their sex. It’s gonna be a helluva night.
From there . . . I’ll leave the rest to your imagination. Let’s just say that the 1-10’s really bring it here, rocking fast and heavy all the way til the last bottle of champagne is finished. This is a wedding full of pure fun, damn fine funk, searing rock, Blind Melon mid-American roots, and a Primus excentricty. I read a review where the writer felt the band was too “all over the place” for him to get into it. Not me. I’m into it. Way into it. I’m shaking my ass with the bride. I’m jamming heavy rock air-guitar with the groom.. I’m giving the Rev Chili Pepper a big, wet one on the lips, and grabbing Mr Screaming Cheetah, hitting the keg and throwing back the whiskey.
And just look out. Later on I’m planning on sneaking into the honeymoon suite. I’m gonna be a part of that too.
--Racer