KELIS's Crazy, Crazy Jewelry Style in Duran-Duran Performance


Looks like Kelis is tryin' to do her old days of her risque jewelry and interesting, dark clothing (it's usually that way, but I can REALLY see the old days in these pictures. She was performing with Duran Duran a few days ago.

Check out another picture and view (Found on NecoleB***hie):

Kelis and Duran Duran
Kelis back to black

Major WOW!!!!



HOTT Ladies At The Knicks Game: LaLa, Kim Kardashian, Angela Simmons


Wassup... I just posted on Kim Kardashian and then I ran into this... more HOTT women here in excellent, excellent style. Women readers, this should be your "NIGHT ON THE TOWN" lookbook.

Check out LaLa Vasquez, the newest wife on the New York Knicks, her best friend Kim Kardashian, and socialite Angela Simmons.

Great looks, thumbs up from THE ONLY JAIDEN!

Kim Kardashian and Lala at Knicks Game



KIM KARDASHIAN Looks in Late 2010-2011

Kim Kardashian ELLEGirl

It's a slow day, so I thought I'd post some pictures of Kim Kardashian in her hott fashion, just to keep the FASHION JUICES flowing:

Kim Kardashian Dines Out at STKKim Kardashian Shows Her Curves at International Dance Academy

(Left) Dropping off her Rolls-Royce Ghost at the valet
(Right) Going to work out

KardashianKardashian

(Left) Shopping with the fam
(Right) With her sister Khloe Kardashian-Odom

Kim Kardashian Kim Kardashian at Macy's

(Left) Getting ice cream...
(Right) Promoting her perfume

You can tell that I'm bored...
but I definitely don't want you to be....

Strand Of Oaks – Pope Killdragon


Full disclosure:  I have never had much success enjoyably listening to bands or albums just because they have a great name.  I don't think very many people do.  However, that is how I stumbled across this hidden gem of an album in 2010.  Strand of Oaks, the recording moniker used by Timothy Showalter, is, at its core, a singer-songwriter project.  Rarely is anything ever heard beyond Showalter's melancholy voice and his guitar.  Many of the songs you don't even hear his voice, choosing to forego that route for simple instrumental tracks.  However, for his second album, Showalter lets go of some of the despair that was the root for his first album, Leave Ruin, and chooses the much quirkier route of writing a concept album.

More disclosure:  I am a sucker for a concept album.  From Neutral Milk Hotel's Anne Frank-inspired indie-folk classic In The Aeroplane Over The Sea to Titus Andronicus' Civil War themed The Monitor, the stranger the concept, the more I am sucked in.  So, what is this grandiose concept that drew me in?  The same disappointment and regret as before, but this time focused around fictional stories involving the Bible, The Kennedy's, and everything in between, up to and including Ghostbusters. That's right folks, Ghostbusters.  Honestly, some of the concepts would not be out of place on one of your favorite metal albums.  Tales of 12-foot monsters leading to mothers crying in the street would seem quite fitting on the new Mastodon album, but not on a quiet indie-folk album.

 But enough of the concept, what about the music?  As I said before, rarely does he disembark from the textbook singer-songwriter aesthetic.  So, as is typical with these albums, the lyrical content is what must stand apart, and he passes with flying colors.  On “Kill Dragon”, Showalter starts of with what would seem like a fitting song on his previous album, singing about how everyone has left him, whether it be through break-ups or death.  However, the tempo picks up, leading to him repeating the line, “Mary, Mary, Mary would you marry me? / Then me and you and Jesus could be a family”.  And that's how the song ends.  That just sets up the strange feel of the album.

 On the next track, the seven minute centerpiece “Sterling”, Showalter launches into a story about a dream he had about a trip he took with the Kennedy's, in which John Kennedy discovers a German tale written by his estranged, bastard son about a pope named Killdragon. However, at the end of it all, he reminds you that he still has a heavy heart, telling about how he “drank himself to sleep, just to get some company”.  But, this is also where the music reaches its apex, a the acoustic guitar is subbed out temporarily for an electric and the drums slowly kick in as Showalter's voice fades out behind the wall of sound, saying “I saw him coming” over and over, further painting the picture of him drinking and passing out, repeating those four words.

The entire album carries this same weight.  As Showalter deftly strides from song-to-song, the listener gets insight into his own life, despite the fact that it is projected onto the wild songs of lore.  Also, in case you were wondering, “Alex Kona” is the song that references 12-foot giants and mothers crying.  “Daniel's Blues” is about Dan Aykroyd wanting John Belushi to have a role in Ghostbusters, but he had passed away.  He sings about who he will get to replace him (But who will I call / Chevy's an ass and Gill has got a cold”).  I won't spoil anything else for you, but it is easily the most cathartic song ever written about Ghostbusters.  Just do yourself a favor, and, if you are a fan of folk music (Or even doom metal, as he shows he can do that too with the song “Giant's Despair”), just listen to the album and let Strand of Oaks wave of tales drown you in its sound.

--Genesis

Buy here: Pope Killdragon



bridal dreeses Joyce Redman She Fell Among Thieves

Joyce Redman She Fell Among Thieves plus size bathing suitsThe BBC drama that launched Mystery! on PBS While on a Pyrenees vacation in 1922, upright English gentleman Richard Chandos (Malcolm McDowell, A Clockwork Orange, Heroes) encounters the villainous Vanity Fair (Eileen Atkins, Cold Mountain). Mistress of the turreted Chateau Jezreel and leader of a motley band of criminals, she will

Tyler Perry's "Jersey Shore" Promo of Snooki *LoL*


Too funny... Tyler Perry's movie "Madea's Big Happy Family" is coming soon. So... here's a promo of Madea as "Snooki" on Jersey Shore. Is this fashion... I mean for my blog?? In a comedic way.... YESSSSSS!!!!!

NeNe Leakes w/ Taylor Armstrong (Housewives of Beverly Hills) Out On the Town


Housewives of Atlanta reality star NeNe Leakes and Housewives of Beverly Hills castmate Taylor Armstrong were spotted out enjoying paparazzi and fun. They looked great as well, especially NeNe with her form-fitting jersey dress and Christian Louboutins.

NeNe is apparently supposed to be starring on the HOUSEWIVES OF BEVERLY HILLS show!!!

WHAAAT???!!! Awkward black dot on a white sheet of paper... just sayin'.... You never know.... IT could work. See more pics of the pair holding hands and going into a steakhouse.


FYI: NeNe is not THAT big; I met her in Detroit one time, and she was my height when she was in heels.
I'm 6'0. Just sayin'....

NeNe and me, 'JAIDEN'

Pic: YBF

without girls images Vipul Patel Paid Consumer Services: Assessing Market Opportunities

Vipul Patel Paid Consumer Services: Assessing Market Opportunities glamour photographers

WILL SMITH Revives His "Fresh Prince" Days In FRESH Outfit


This powerhouse-- WILL SMITH-- the guy that rakes billions of dollars for movie companies, the guy whose daughter has people "whipping their hair" all over the world (Willow Smith), the guy who has a get-better-with-age wife, and--- this dude just has it all.

Sidenote: He's rehearsing for Men In Black III.

Will Smith seems to revive his FRESH PRINCE OF BEL-AIR days by wearing an equally fresh outfit. Wearing ALEXANDER McQUEEN jeans and NIKE BLAZER sneakers for $100, he's just killing the game effortlessly.

Pic: UpscaleHype

Burzum - Fallen

 Hmmm... how to begin this.
Disclosure:
1: Most of my adult life I've worked in forensic psychology, in prisons and police departments in six states, specifically with sexual offenders and serial homicide offenders.
2: I dig (though by no means am tr00 or kvlt) black metal; of course I still consider Behemoth black(ish) metal, and love Liturgy, so....
3: Burzum, aka Varg Vikernes, served time in Norwegian prison for murder and arson.
This highlights a sticky area for reviewers: how do you review a piece of (at least alleged) art, knowing the potentially toxic background of the artist?
Do you avoid the Ad Hominem fallacy ("He's a bad man, so he can never have anything good to say!") and listen earnestly to what he's done?
Or do we say Fuck that shit, murdering, church burning bastard.
And it's deceptively easy, from the safely of reading the monitor, to say "you go, burn that shit!" or something similar.
Now imagine your mother or grandmother being burned alive in a building she found peaceful, or held onto as a symbol, or source of peace.
Regardless of your opinion toward the church and/or Christianity (and the perhaps-inevitable paradoxes inherent therein), there are serious, life-changing repercussions of what Mr. Vikernes was convicted of doing.
The point is, this area gets emotionally tangled very quickly, especially to me; I'm likely to be particularly irritated by the artist's history and perhaps not enjoy this work as well as someone else might. Be warned, and read on with that in the background of your cerebellum.
So.
If his musical work, despite his background, is good, do we say it's good? Do we endorse it?
Maybe put more directly-- if Hitler gave you the winning lottery numbers, would you play them?
Or would you object to the millions you'd get, despite the millions dead?
[Although I'm phrasing this question somewhat rhetorically, I'm obviously working up to a review of the work in question. But: wouldn't it be hilarious if I just concluded it wasn't something that should be reviewed at all, and just stopped here? Something like, soup Nazi style: "No review for you!"]
Overall, Fallen sounds like it cost $10 to make; does that make it tr00? Or is it like John Cougar Mellancamp or Joel McHale, spending hours on a haircut, trying to make it look like they spent 10 seconds on it?
If the appearance, at least, of low-budget recording appeals to you, well then... there you go.
Track one, "Jeg Faller": sounds like my first guitar, a Harmony, played through its accompanying 1.5 inch speaker, with no gain-- but somehow does not sound bad...? Like all tracks on Fallen, it's a mix of ambient, electro-pop (somehow: maybe it's because of what I'm certain is a drum machine and its stiffness...?), black metal, folk music, acoustic pop... actually, it might be easier to list what musics don't end up somewhere on here.
"Valen," like the previous track, follows the songwriting trope of less-melodic verse followed by "catchy" chorus with cleanish vocals. And it pretty much works.
"Vanvidd" continues both the Norwegian lyrics and musical themes: cold, tremolo-picked chords in standard tuning, with murmured lyrics that become hoarse and raspy, replete with blast beats... managing to sound like black metal and ambient relaxation music (seriously) at the same time.... Bonus: at around 3:45 it manages to invoke both Ministry and Joy Division....
"Enhver till Sitt" starts with that same shrill, high-gain non-wound guitar string, bleating a flatted-fifth (sinister) riff.... The remaining tracks "Budstikken" (black metal Pet Shop Boys? Dance floor KMFDM?) and "Til Hel og Tilbake Igjen" (say what you will about the songs themselves, but Norwegian song titles sound metal as shit, don't they?) are interesting, above average black metal.
So-- the overall verdict here is actually quite anticlimactic: Fallen is pretty good.
It's got good moments, and interesting uses of texture and contrast. It's not great. It's not terrible. It's the germ of something great.
Whether Burzum is past his greatness, or approaching it, is anyone's guess.
 --Horn
Buy here: Fallen
Buy here vinyl: Fallen 
Buy here mp3: Fallen 


Alex Pettyfer Alex Pettyfer Mini Poster #01 11\"x17\" Master Print

underwear blog Alex Pettyfer Alex Pettyfer Mini Poster #01 11\"x17\" Master Print muslim dating

LOL: Gabourey Sidibe's Long Lost Sister!! (Fash, Crash, and Burn)


WOW... Ease up on the foundation, gurl.....

This belongs in my FASH, CRASH, AND BURN category. Sorry Precious....
This will only be acceptable if you were going to a fun, REALLY FUN party and not a "regular" party.

Media Takeout is somethin' else... far-fetched...but still funny...



A Cool Black T: Joe Jonas' Graphic "Heart" T-Shirt

Joe Jonas

Sometimes wearing a simple black T-shirt needs to have a lil' more of something to it. Like a pocket T-shirt would handsomely accomodate a handkerchief, and a black T-shirt can have even the smallest of graphics, like JOE JONAS' Comme Des Garcon T-shirt. Judging by the shirt and his break up with Ashley Greene (not that I care; just sayin'...), he's available for the girls who want him.

Brightens up the whole shirt and has a deep meaning to it, doesn't it?

Joe Jonas

Pic: Celebuzz

Keyshia Cole's Hott Guiseppe Zanotti Heels Heat Up Her Performance


check out Keyshia Cole slimmed down and belting out a live performance recently. The 'talk of town' was not really her performance, but her attention-grabbing heels by shoe great Guiseppe Zanotti (falls in same line as Christian Louboutin).

You like? I like. If you don't like, then I don't like you. LOL, just kiddin'....

Maaan... just love 'em... sexy on any lady...


Pic: NecoleB***hie

AMY WINEHOUSE In Argyle Dress; Looks Better Than Ever!


Just doin' a fly-by this morning; Amy Winehouse (spotted in London) really looks great, a far cry from her "dirty" self that included holes in her stockings and dirty feet..

She wore a nice Fred Perry argyle dress for $148.

Pic: UpscaleHype

Ripple Theater - Lemmy: 49% Motherf**ker, 51% Son of a Bitch DVD


Ever since people stopped buying rock records in decent quantities, there’s been an increase in quality documentaries on classic artists like The Ramones and Rush as well as rescuing a band like Anvil from obscurity. Given the subject matter, it seemed like Lemmy: 49% Motherf**ker, 51% Son of a Bitch would be the ultimate portrait of rocks favorite ugly son but unfortunately this one falls pretty short of expectation. While definitely worth watching, the overwhelming feeling I’m left with is “what happened? How did they not get the job done?”

Granted, I’m a bigger Motorhead fan than most Motorhead fans. Motorhead’s music changed my life the first time I shoplifted Iron Fist from Caldors back in 1982, and when I saw them for the first time in 1983 my ears rang for 8 days afterwards. To this day, all live performances are measured against that high energy volume overkilldose. It’s obvious the filmmakers are fans but not stone deaf forever Motorheadbangers. They have stated many times that the movie is about Lemmy and not a history of Motorhead but we all know that those two things are one and the same.

Some of the better parts of the film are about Lemmy’s days before Motorhead, including a great segment about the Rockin’ Vicars, the band he played guitar for in the mid-1960’s. They managed to track down some of his band mates and even legendary producer Shel Talmy (The Who, The Kinks) who make it clear that Lemmy was pretty much the same guy back then that he is now. The section on Hawkwind is also good. Lemmy repeats his often told tale of how he got fired from the legendary space rock band, but you also get to hear Dave Brock and Nik Turner’s side of the story, too. Even the Amazonian dancer Stacia gets some screen time. Unfortunately, there isn’t that much discussion of Hawkwind’s groundbreaking music. No one mentions that everyone should own a copy of Space Ritual and there’s no information about the classic albums Lemmy made with them.

The formation of Motorhead takes up about 120 seconds of screen time. Guitarist Fast Eddie Clarke is on and off the screen way too quickly. Philthy Animal Taylor apparently did not want to be interviewed for the movie and he’s barely mentioned. Again, there’s hardly a word on the incredible run of albums that line up made. Wurzel, Pete Gill and Brian Robertson are written out of the script. Mikkey Dee and Phil Campbell wind up looking like mere sidemen of a band that they’re equal partners in.

Way too much screen time is spent on pointless interviews with Billy Bob Thorton, Jarvis Cocker and the bass player from New Order. Who fucking cares what these clowns have to say about Lemmy? The usual VH1 talking heads like Scott Ian, Dee Snider, Dave Navarro and Henry Rollins have some good stories and there are interviews with all the members of Metallica except, surprisingly, Lars Ulrich. Dee has one of the funniest lines in the movie where he talks about not having seen Lemmy for a long time and goes backstage and it’s all the same roadies that he knew from ten years before. Dave Vanian and Captain Sensible of The Damned share some great tales from the insanity they participated in with Lemmy in the late 70’s. 

One thing that the filmmakers get right is showing just how dedicated Lemmy is to his music. This is someone that has literally sacrificed everything for rock n roll. He’s had some moderate success but lives in a rent controlled 2 bedroom apartment with his enormous World War II collection when he’s not on tour or at the Rainbow Bar & Grill in LA. He has one son that he has a good relationship with and another one he’s never met. When he’s not playing music, he’s reading or gambling but always drinking.

Luckily the DVD helps correct some of the problems with the feature film. It’s worth picking up just for the full interview with Fast Eddie Clarke. It’s up to him to tell the real story of how the band started and he’s the only one to mention original guitarist Larry Wallis by name. Eddie also gives insight into how Motorhead got their signature sound – speedy music played by guys on speed. He claims that speed is a great drug to take when you’re playing music since you don’t have to leave the stage every 20 minutes to re-up. His story on how they wrote their signature song “Overkill” is hilarious and inspiring.

Other cool extras include extended interviews with Lemmy and individual features on Phil Campbell and Mikkey Dee. The movie could have used more of this and less ass kissing testimonials. Any movie about Lemmy is worth watching, and this one definitely is, but it should have been so much better.



--Woody


Buy here DVD: Lemmy: 49% Motherf**ker, 51% Son Of A Bitch 
Buy here Blu-ray: Lemmy: 49% Motherf**ker, 51% Son of a Bitch [Blu-ray] 



 

Ripple News - Katatonia Announces ‘Last FairDeal Gone Down’ And ‘Night is the New Day’ Special Editions

    

Sweden’s Katatonia has announced that it will release special editions of the critically acclaimed albums, Last Fair Deal Gone Down and Night is the New Day, on April 25th, to coincide with a series of special shows to mark the band’s 20th anniversary in May.

The special 10th anniversary edition of the classic Last Fair Deal Gone Down will be presented in deluxe mediabook packaging, as a two-disc edition containing tracks from the now hard-to-find singles, ‘Teargas’ and ‘Tonight’s Music’.  2009’s stellar album, Night is the New Day, will include bonus tracks from the ‘The Longest Year’ EP.  Both titles will be presented with newly updated cover artwork courtesy of original artist Travis Smith.

Performances for the 20th anniversary “Last Fair Day Gone Night Tour 2011” are scheduled for Luxembourg, Germany, Holland, France, England, and Greece, and the band will perform two sets at each show.   The first set will see the band play Last Fair Deal Gone Down front to back.  The second set will consist of a mixed set of carefully picked songs from the band’s extensive catalogue.

The band is offering exclusive VIP ticket packages, limited to only 70 for each show, which will include a laminated VIP pass exclusive to the show, access to sound check, a meet and greet with Katatonia, a t-shirt exclusive to that particular show, a special tour program, and a very special limited edition vinyl of their latest opus, Night is The New Day, amongst other exclusive items.  All the goods will be included in a specially made Katatonia messenger bag.  The VIP laminate will also allow early access to venues, so that VIPs can get the best seats in the house.

In addition, all VIPs will automatically be entered into a draw for a grand prize made available by a selection of the band´s equipment endorsers.

            Head over to: www.katatonia.com/tour-dates for more information.

            Dates and venues are as follows:

May 4th  – Kulturfabrik – Luxembourg **
May 5th – Stollwerck – Cologne, Germany**
May 6th – Koko – London, UK (Live DVD recording)**
May 7th – De Kade – Zaandam, Holland**
May 8th – Alhambra – Paris, France**
May 14th – Fuzz Live Music Club – Athens, Greece

** Exclusive VIP packages available for these shows.

Sneaker of the Day: Y-3 (Yohji Yamamoto) Neo Classic High Sneakers


These are very interesting. I guess you're wondering how this made it into my "Sneaker of the Day" post. Well, uniqueness always trumps. The sneakers above looks like a $290 sock... as a matter of fact, IT IS A $290 'SOCK'. The sneaker has a sockliner and it's lightweight to feel like a sock.

Very OUTER-SPACE, DIFFERENT; I LIKE IT. Would I wear it, though? No.

Captain America

sorry, haven't been around. I have been given a brilliant opportunity to create a new title so have been snowed under - I hope to make amends!

Anyway, here's the Captain America trailer:

girls bikini beach Carol Alt Carol Alt Picture

girls bikini beach Carol AltCarol Alt PictureCarol Alt Added Mar 7 2009 Views 115Carol Alt PictureCarol Alt Added Mar 7 2009 Views 128Carol Alt PictureCarol Alt Added Mar 7 2009 Views 120

Chat with Stone Axe Live on Ripple Radio Before they Storm the Shores of Europe and the UK with New Tour and Deluxe CD/DVD Package



Classic rock preservationists Stone Axe have officially announced that they’re hitting the road through the UK, parts of Europe, and wrapping up the tour with a night at the illustrious Roadburn Festival in Tilburg, Holland! And before they hit the road, this is your chance to chat live on the air and in the Ripple chatroom with Stone Axe mainman, Tony Reed.

Tune into Ripple Radio (Live with Tony Reed), sign into the chatroom and chat directly with Tony Reed.  He'll join us on air Wednesday, March 23rd at 8:30pm (PST) and is welcoming the fans to fire off those nagging questions. Hit him with your queries about Stone Axe, Mos Generator, Wino, or any aspect of obscure '70's rock.  Type 'em in the chatroom and have 'em answered on the air. Doesn't get much better than that!

Then, starting on April 8th in Oxford, England and running through April 16th, Stone Axe will embark on their third tour to foreign soil with the aim of converting new ears to their sonic-brand of classic rock.  Better yet, this time they’ll be doing it in support of their first CD/DVD package. Scheduled for release on April 5th and in time for the tour, Stone Axe has put together a Deluxe Edition of their self-titled debut album. The CD portion of the package features eight bonus live tracks, while the DVD portion features more than 70 minutes of videos, interviews, and live footage! Released through Ripple Music, Stone Axe – Expanded Edition CD/DVD pre-order's are now available on the label's web site. www.ripple-music.com

Tour Dates:

8th April -The Wheatsheaf, Oxford (with Stubb, Trippy Wicked, Desert Storm)
9th April- The Unicorn, Camden, London, UK (with Stubb, Trippy Wicked, Grifter)
10th April- The Earl, Sheffield, UK (with Stubb, Trippy Wicked, Groan)
11th April- The Captains Rest, Glasgow (with Stubb, Trippy Wicked, Low Sonic Drift)
12th April- Asylum 2, Birmingham (with Stubb, Trippy Wicked, Alunah)
14th April- The Vortex, Siegen, Germany (with Stubb)
15th April- MTC, Cologne, Germany (with Stubb+more)
16th April- Roadburn Festival, Tilburg, Holland

Stone Axe has also contributed a song to the Heavy Ripples double vinyl 7” compilation that will also feature three other acts that have put their own unique spin on the sounds from a by-gone 70’s era, showing that rock n’ roll hasn’t died, but simply has gotten better! The compilation record will include tracks from the UK blues-based bike rockers Grifter, Brooklyn-based stoner-fied punks Mighty High, and New England’s southern-rock-tinged Sun Gods In Exile (on loan from incomparable Small Stone Records). The record will be officially released on April 19th to a world-wide audience!


In Memoriam of ELIZABETH TAYLOR (1932-2011)

WOW... that's a pretty white woman. If THIS was in 2011... watch out!!

In respect of the royal woman of glamour, fashion, and beauty, I want to post a few pictures of Elizabeth Taylor, the one who many women across the world looked up to and many men, as well, doubled back to look at this gorgeous figurine who was the centerpiece of magazines and the big screen for decades.

Elizabeth Taylor (Feb. 27, 1932- Mar. 23, 2011)





You will be missed...

KIM KARDASHIAN Does Dangerous Photo Shoot With Tiger (No, it did not eat her!!)

Kim Kardashian and tiger (left) for photo shoot

You can tell she was clearly scared. The tiger has to be restrained by a trainer while the Kardashians took a family picture. Now, I have done a few photo shoots, but I don't know if I'll be ready to do something to THAT extreme; if it does happen.....OOOOOK.

See what else Kim had to say about the photo shoot:

"I tried posing with the white tiger at our family photo shoot for Keeping Up with the Kardashians season six last week, but I was so scared!!!! The tiger had to get into position on his own! It was freakkkky! He got a little frisky so the trainer had to come help out. This is probably one of the scariest moments I’ve had during a photo shoot."
- Kim Kardashian

body girdles Kimberly Cole moss topshop 1 jpg

body girdles Kimberly ColeLily Cole is Jude Laws new girlfriend jude law photoLadies man Jude Law might have a new girlfriend Just a few weeks after Jude was seen sucking face with Kimberly Stewart he already seems to have a new love interest Jude is reportedlyarticle 1033323 005EE65F00000578 79 468x486 jpgsize eight or ten was normal but I was reading things saying look how much weight she

The Shoes CHRIS BROWN Wore On The Day Of His "GMA" Outburst


...And he sure looked stylish doing it, too.... *SMH*
I'm a trip (meaning 'silly guy')....

These are Jeremy Scott x Adidas Clear "Wings" Sneakers for $185. Whoopi Goldberg wore the same thing on the same day, on "The View."

Hours After the AFTERMATH:

Chris Brown Shoots Hoops in NYCChris Brown Goood Morning America
Chris Brown
Pic: UpscaleHype/ Celebuzz

Total Fucking Destruction - Hater


“Good evening.  I’m your host Glen Moderator.  Welcome to Point / Counterpoint, a show featuring informative debates on hot-button topics.  Today’s program is a little different than normal.  Our regular contributor Penfold is here of course, but unfortunately I have to report that tonight’s scheduled guest was forced to cancel due to an unforeseen emergency.  The show must go on however, so we found a willing replacement to assist us on such short notice.  Ladies and gentlemen help me welcome Richard Hoak, drummer and lead vocalist of the band Total Fucking Destruction.  Thank you for being here sir.  Penfold, are you ready?
“Yes Glen, I am.”
“All right, let’s begin.  Due to the nature of our guest’s vocation, we’re going to be asking after some music related issues.  Here’s an easy one to get us started.  Do you believe that the current state of music is getting better or worse?  Mr. Hoak, you can go first.”
“I long for and listen for a deathlike silence to engulf the planet. Otherwise, I listen to 24 hour news radio for the up to the moment information on the slow motion apocalypse that is unfolding around us.”*
“Ha, very good!  And you Penfold?”
“I’m afraid my answer won’t be as interesting as Mr. Hoak’s.  I’ve been listening to a wide variety of music lately, and I’m confident that music is better than it has ever been.  Unfortunately, the albums I’m most excited about I can’t talk about thanks to a non-disclosure agreement.”
“That’s too bad.  We’ll just have to move on then.  Mr. Hoak, when I think of what it means to be an underground act, and I mean this in a complimentary manner, your band registers in my mind immediately.  Do you feel an underground band will break through to massive popularity this year?”
“The only reason such obscure artistic concepts like the underground scenes of grind and death metal exist is because of the privilege and power provided to selected citizens by the global corporate economy that allows the leisure time and extra income to make such noise. No guitar riff is brutal when compared with watching your children slowly starving to death or dying an early, violent death in a religious war of hate. The underground scene is a state of mind, an artificial construct based on collective ego stroking by members of the ‘in’ crowd. I refuse to be defined by others, so my state of mind is unaffected.”*
“Okay…I guess.  Penfold, what say you?”
“While I think it is more difficult than ever to really ‘break through’ to the mainstream consciousness, yes I do believe there will be some artist or band who has been toiling for a few years that will make that transition.  It seems to happen once every year or two, so I’d say we’re due.”
“I’m inclined to agree with your reasoning Penfold.  Mr. Hoak, assuming Penfold is correct, what can you do to increase the marketability of Total Fucking Destruction?”
“Total Fucking Destruction is driven to create temporary autonomous zones where we can celebrate the end of times in the style of Babylon together with other like-minded individuals. We encourage all individuals to get in touch.”^^
“What does that even mea…?”
“Penfold, hold on a moment.  I’m going to give Mr. Hoak a chance to further explain that statement.  How exactly do you go about creating these temporary autonomous zones?”
“Maintaining localized anti-racist, anti-sexist, anti-homophobic atmosphere. Forgetting about unknown motherfuckers. Grind 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Some days I don't eat or sleep, only grind. Time is running out, the future is now and we are participating in the end of history. It's fucking awesome.”^^
Glen and I sit in stunned silence.  After a few moments, Glen collects himself.
“Ladies and gentlemen we’re going to take a short commercial break, but we’ll be back with more after these words from our corporate sponsors.”



Cards on the table time waveriders.  I know next to nothing about grindcore metal.  Honest.  I don’t yet own any grindcore albums, I’ve never seen a true grindcore band live, there are no stickers on anything I own advertising a grindcore band, and there is no chance that I would be able to differentiate a song by Napalm Death from a song by Carcass if my life depended on it.  With all that being said I do know what I like, and I like Total Fucking Destruction!

The name of the album that has managed to hold my attention for a good little while now is Hater.  It is the latest full length release from TFD, and it is composed of twenty seven ear-blasting songs.  The uninitiated (like me) might make the mistake of looking at the quantity of songs on offer and assume that this was a monstrous two disc affair.  Not so, as I quickly learned.  These twenty seven songs lay waste to your eardrums in a little under twenty eight minutes.  What I find most impressive is that I listened to this album multiple times before noticing the short running time.  Hater is such a complete listening experience, I feel fulfilled with every run through.  It was truly shocking to find out that some of my favorite songs had such short running times.

What should you expect to get from this album waveriders?  Well, you should definitely expect a blitzkrieg assault upon your senses accomplished with lightning-quick guitar and bass lines coupled with mind-bogglingly manic drumming.  You know…grindcore music.  Now if that last statement produces concerns over whether these songs might become monotonous, fear not, for this band throws quite a bit of variety at the listener.  Seriously, it is not difficult at all to tell these songs apart.  Most are quite memorable thanks to huge riffs, crazy lyrics, interesting breakdowns, or unique song structures.

“Weaponization of the Mega-Self” opens the proceedings with the aforementioned blitzkrieg assault, functioning as a righteous call to arms for the rest of the album.  Highlights abound.  “Everything you Need but Nothing you Want” begins frenetically before transforming into this heavy groove monster.  “It’s Only Attitude” brandishes it’s message of self-empowerment like a bludgeoning instrument.  “Repeat Repeatedly” refuses to leave my conscious thoughts.  “Green Fire” is thrashtastic and features a fantastic guitar solo!  “Time Theft”, a virtual marathon run clocking in at two minutes and twenty seven seconds, bowls me over every time with this wickedly repeated upward-scaling guitar riff.  Look waveriders, I could go on but I think your time would be better served by listening to this album for yourself.  Do it!  Do it now!  With that, we now return you to your regularly scheduled program.

“All right, we’re back.  I’d like to thank our two esteemed guests this evening.  Penfold, great job as always.”
“Why thank you Glen.”
“And Mr. Richard Hoak, I’m not sure that we have ever had anyone on the program quite like you sir.  Thanks for filling in on such short notice.  Are there any last words you wish to express before the show ends?”
“Nihilism, nothingness, emptiness and nonsense is the agenda of Total Fucking Destruction. Our songs are true stories of life in the modern day world. Our interest is in both the music and the message; our art is our only possible response to the complicated questions that post-modern society asks of the individual human.”*
“Right!  There is no way I can compete with that statement.  Good night everybody.”

--Penfold

Buy here: Haters


*- Actual interview responses from Richard Hoak on Chronicles of Chaos  http://www.chroniclesofchaos.com/articles/chats/1-744_total_fucking_destruction.aspx
^^- Actual interview responses from Richard Hoak on The Sleeping Shaman  http://www.thesleepingshaman.com/interviews/totalfuckingdestruction/totalfuckingdestruction.php